Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

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Gryphon Chick
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by Gryphon Chick »

JuliusCreed wrote:
Gryphon Chick wrote:Charonis the centaur and Treestump the puck are both surprised be the question. "We would be more than happy to undertake a quest on your behalf, if the money is right," Treestump answers before Charonis can interject.

He spins toward the puck and lady centaur with a broad grin, chuckling softly to himself. "Ahhhh there's the greed old Torc was rumbling about. Don't you worry, My diminutive friend, the money will most certainly be right, though likely not even close to the greatest of the rewards involved."


"Tis not greed, its common sense. You call us all in here like some kinda Willy Wonka and expect us to jump through yer hoops without so much as a dime up front. Rewards are all fine and good, but there is the matter of money up front for expenses, as the troll said."
"Sorry, I'm busy tonight...Same thing I do every night...Trying the take over the world..."
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by gaby »

Hallow is any bodie here?
Say the leader of a few Soldiers.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

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A young man enters the shop from a doorway on the planet Xacton. Dressed in what appears to be a long ivory pleated trench coat with golden buttons on the front, ivory trousers, black (silk?) ruffled shirt, gold vest, white head band, and black riding boots (elven by the looks of them). What looks like a katana and wakizashi on his back. With a ka (cobra) staff in his left hand and a bag that truly glows of magic in his right. You notice he appears to be in his late teens/early 20s with long, blond, and curly hair. "Military" stance (shoulders back, chest out, chin up). And green eyes scanning the room. He nods and heads to the familiar/pet section. Browses the selection, sighs heavily, and then comes over to the desk. And whispers "Greetings, on behalf of the Tri-Moons Guild as he pulling up the sleeve of his trench and shirt sleeve very quickly flashing a soft glowing tattoo of 3 moons to you that appeared to fade away even before he pulled the sleeve back up. And mutters slightly louder, but still under his breath, "May the secrets of magic never be lost, may they be forever used to fight against the forces of darkness." Then he dispenses with the formalities and says in a clam, soft, tone"I am looking for a familiar, and I heard just moments ago that you had one of the living metallic silver falcon for sale. But I must have over looked it or did it sell already? Or do you keep it in another section? It would comes in most handy to fight the werewolves, vampires, and other undead in Eastern Jopbah, if what I hear about the birds is true."
Ankh, udja, seneb.
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The Oh So Amazing Nate
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by The Oh So Amazing Nate »

As others stand up and either question Uncle Remus about his proposed quest, swear their assistance, or decline his invitation, Joe seems to become lost in his own thoughts. With a noticeable start and a loud chuff of surprise he jumps to his feet, plops his worn duffel bag right on the table and begins to rummage through it.

Strung among a litany of: snarls, growls, and odd strangling noises that might be swear words, listeners are able to make out the phrases; "somewhere, just saw, damn thing, and lots'a crap." Joe thrusts one arm into the large bag all the way up to his shoulder and fishes around for a moment before coming back up with what looks to be an incredibly ancient glass vial that has been sealed with bee's wax. It is caked in layers of dust and has strange, glowing, orange characters painted on the sides.

Joe holds it up and roars an "aha!" of triumph. Cradling the vial carefully in his large paws, he walks to the head of the table and presents it to Uncle Remus.
"Wizard Gallahan. ... water...holy grail (table 7 #57) immortal.. "
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:
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The Oh So Amazing Nate
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by The Oh So Amazing Nate »

Someone go poke Remus with a stick
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by Stone Gargoyle »

The Oh So Amazing Nate wrote:Someone go poke Remus with a stick
I would do that if I knew where he was. As it is, since he is basically retired from the boards, you will have a long wait if you are expecting his response.
"SG, you are a limitless fountain of Butt-Saving Advice. You Rock, Stone and Concrete." ~ TrumbachD
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The Oh So Amazing Nate
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by The Oh So Amazing Nate »

I saw a post of his dated as recently as christmas eve. maybe i'll look it up and see if it was from '13 or '12
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:
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Stone Gargoyle
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by Stone Gargoyle »

He does not always get on a computer where he can make responses to this thread. Sometimes he gets on and does not respond. It is annoying.
"SG, you are a limitless fountain of Butt-Saving Advice. You Rock, Stone and Concrete." ~ TrumbachD
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JuliusCreed
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

Stone Gargoyle wrote:He does not always get on a computer where he can make responses to this thread. Sometimes he gets on and does not respond. It is annoying.

Yes it most certainly can get annoying, especially when he takes nearly a year to come back on and let everyone know he's still alive and well :D Apologies to all, but life took some serous turns for me and made being online difficult at best for me. But fear not... I shall still be an avid supporter of the Palladium line and will strive to frequent the forums more often in the future.
Sure, lions and tigers are stronger...
But I've never seen a wolf jump through hoops in a circus
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The Oh So Amazing Nate
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by The Oh So Amazing Nate »

Hot damn! Welcome back sir!!
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by zyanitevp »

JuliusCreed wrote:
Stone Gargoyle wrote:He does not always get on a computer where he can make responses to this thread. Sometimes he gets on and does not respond. It is annoying.

Yes it most certainly can get annoying, especially when he takes nearly a year to come back on and let everyone know he's still alive and well :D Apologies to all, but life took some serous turns for me and made being online difficult at best for me. But fear not... I shall still be an avid supporter of the Palladium line and will strive to frequent the forums more often in the future.

Welcome back!!
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by SittingBull »

Welcome back Julius.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by pblackcrow »

"While the Master's away, Bubbles doest play. Hello Folks, I'm felling in for Remus."
Ankh, udja, seneb.
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Stone Gargoyle
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by Stone Gargoyle »

pblackcrow wrote:"While the Master's away, Bubbles doest play. Hello Folks, I'm felling in for Remus."
Okay, then, start posting stuff.
"SG, you are a limitless fountain of Butt-Saving Advice. You Rock, Stone and Concrete." ~ TrumbachD
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by ShadowHawk »

a fairly muscular man covered in tattoos that radiates magic and wearing a loin cloth with a pocket in front, boots, and a leather harness to hold his swords in, walks in and asks, "What do you have in the winter line, I need something that will allow me to both touch my tattoos and keep me warm, I am going north to explore?"
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

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Might I suggest this ravishing mystic hooded cloak of everwarm, made from the skin of a great white snow bear, endowed with magic to not only keep you comfortably even in the coldest environment, it offers you an AR of 11 and 40 SDC, it regenerates 1 point every minute, but wait; that's not all...when it has bonded to you, it will come alive when you need an extra beast to fight at your side or can be set to come alive whenever anyone comes within 25 feet of it...in this regard it can guard you while you are sleeping...reanimation magic lasts for about 10 minutes or until killed. Just be sure you are NOT wearing it when the reanimation is activated. It is a full circle cloak with about 2 inches of over lap. 50,000gp. And also, might I suggest a pair of boots, oh wait." *Gasps!* "We seam to be out at the moment. I will have some back in stock in a day or 2. Where are you staying so I can send you a message?

We however have enviro-tents in a magic snuff box, any size and shape you want and made from spidergoat silk, setup and take down in under 5 seconds as explained on the underside of the box. Or if you would prefer something a bit more stable, might I recommend these?" points to some miniature houses, which today would be considered "toothpick houses". Everything from Tudor style manors to log cabins,, although, no castles I am afraid; however two of them are stone towers. interestingly one of the Tudor style manors looks like its ready to collapse at anytime; holes in the roof, burnt marks, etc. Bubbles will say, "Don't let the size of these fool you, because every MM is equal to a foot and some of the cabins are built from stonewood. Prices ranging from 10,000 - 1,500,000gp."

He pauses to look around at what all is in stock.

"We also have Campfire sphere spell beads (good for 1 spell per bead, break it to activate, and they are 10th level) 25 gold per bead. Instant meals pills just add water or spit, 5-150gp per pill. The magic tea pot, it will always have hot tea in it, available in a verity of teas; just set the dial to the one you would like and twist the lid to poor. But the magic is just good for 1 years and 20 days, then it will have to be renewed at a super nexus; at which point t's good for another 1.25 years. Thus is the nature of things forges or crafted using dragons fire. Much easier to enchant things which work right on. Plus they are almost indestructible; BUT it only lasts for a short time, at which point they must be recharged. And each time it's recharged cut the time in half, regardless of if it needs to be recharged then or not. Though I will tell you this much, the max time is better for porcelain than it is for ceramics or metals. And the smaller the item is the better it is. Anyway, the tea pot's priced at 3,000."
Ankh, udja, seneb.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

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"Neat. Curious, what do the boots do? And I'm staying at the Silver Moon Tavern."

"Spider-goat silk, what's that?" he will inquire. "Very impressive structures...Except one." pointing to the one in disrepair "Um, tell me, is that the one with that is 10000? And why would any one pay so much for 1.5 million for a structure?"

"Those will prove useful...But tell me about the spell beads...can any spell be put into one?" "Instant meals pills...Curious." "Magic tea pot, interesting."
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

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"The boots allow you to walk on top of snow with out falling in, keeps you warm, and lets you walk on ice without slipping."

"Spider-goats are creatures from another dimension, their silk is extremely tough. Silk cloth have an AR of 12 and 15 SDC per square yard."

"One would think so by looking, but no. This is 100,000 gold. The exterior is a false facade to distract the onlookers and make it look like no one lives there. This one was commissioned for a certain guild which guild house (ha, hideout is more likely) got raided before it was finished. It's complete with a circle of teleportation, a full basement, 4 sub-basements, 12 magical exits, 3 vaults, smokeless chimneys, etc. Heck, it even has bathhouse. A mage on the go would. Let's just say, that these towers are far more than they appear. Rather like your pyramids are, Atlantian." and smirks smugly.

"Sadly, no. Only spells of lesser mana (PPE)...10 being the absolute maximum amount."
Ankh, udja, seneb.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by ShadowHawk »

1 Cloak, 2 boots, 50 instant meals pills, 50 campfire sphere spell beads, a small stone wood cabin, a magic tea pot, and what else do you have that might come in handy?
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

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ShadowHawk wrote:1 Cloak, 2 boots, 50 instant meals pills, 50 campfire sphere spell beads, a small stone wood cabin, a magic tea pot, and what else do you have that might come in handy?

"Magical forest soap, this will completely mask your scent for 3 days...I will throw one in for free." Looks around the master's shop..."Since you're heading through the bearmen's turf, and other inhabitants of the forests, speed and stealth are both good ideas. And so," bubbles floats a 3 inch saddle over to you. "Do not be fooled by appearances. Ach-ke-tuft!" The little saddle expands to a size saddle. "Dimensional pocket saddle bags on either side hold upto 525lbs, made for a comfortable ride, upon the phantom horse that can be summoned 2 times a for 10 hours each time, now this particular saddle has the ability to make any thing that it's attached to add 30 mph to its top speed for a burst of 10 minutes with the phrase "let 'er budge". The saddle stays in place once the phrase "vana scre" then will release when the word "filonjay" is spoken, or the phantom horse is recalled or time elapses. Ka-te-ven-yie!" and the saddle shrinks back to 3 inches. "And how about a kilt instead of a loincloth?"
Ankh, udja, seneb.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

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"Excellent, how much is the saddle? And how much does it weigh?"
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

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"For you, and only you...considerably less then the full price for a trained race horse...37,500k. it weighs 2 oz when it's in it's current state. In it's larger state, 5 pounds."
Ankh, udja, seneb.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

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he will ask, "Anything for going to the latrine in that will cover or get rid of the the smell?"
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

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"As a matter of fact, yes." Bubbles will say, and levitates a medium red "velvet looking" sack...3'/4'. "It is a dimensional pocket with a strange beasty resembling a blow worm trapped with in it. Although it can't except, it will eat anything. So...I WOULDN'T, and I repeat, WOULDN'T put anything in it that I wanted to keep...INCLUDING BODY PARTS! But it's great for disposing of unwanted thing and bodies."
Ankh, udja, seneb.
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JuliusCreed
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

:-D Wow. Has it really been nearly 7 years? Far far too long a time to be away from the things and people I love so dearly.
Yes friends and customers, it's true. The one and only Uncle Remus has returned to blow the dust off this old shop, take stock of what's still here and start refilling by the extra space with new weird and wondrous stuff. Plus, as an added bonus, I am taking this show on the road!
'What?!' You may ask. 'On the road? How is this possible?'
Well, as many of you may already know, Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane can literally be found in any city, town, village or hamlet in any dimension, planet or timeline your imagination can take you to. But now, I've expanded my horizons a bit and added a sort of mobile merchant caravan to the mix. All the fun and inventory of the original Emporium stuffed into a horse-drawn wagon rolling over the hills, highways and byways of the Megaverse.
And of course from time to time a travelling merchant is going to have a need for a little extra protection. So if you happen to come across this rickety old caravan out in the wilds of the worlds, there may even be a job waiting for you as well as a quick, fresh supply of Whoop-Ass.
So come on back to Uncle Remus' Travelling Emporium of the Arcane, your one stop shop for all your mystic, magical and just plain weird needs. The door is open and the light is on. :-D
Sure, lions and tigers are stronger...
But I've never seen a wolf jump through hoops in a circus
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Stone Gargoyle
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by Stone Gargoyle »

Yes, it has been seven years. A lot of people have moved on, but hopefully you can still generate interest in this old thread.
"SG, you are a limitless fountain of Butt-Saving Advice. You Rock, Stone and Concrete." ~ TrumbachD
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JuliusCreed
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

I shall certainly strive to old friend. And it is certainly good to see you again. Perhaps you could help spread the word of the Grand Re-Opening of the Emporium with news of a rather interesting artifact I happened to stumble across while I was away.
*slips a hand below the counter and retrieves a shimmering emerald nearly as large as the palm of his hand, wrapped in an intricate latticework of gold. As the light catches it, the stone seems to thrum with a soft light of its own and you can almost feel the power of the mystic energy throbbing within it*
I came across this little wonder in the Old Kingdom Mountains. Its name is Mogravid the Chameleon, and it is a rare and unique Rune Gem; a large gemstone that is not only completely covered in runes, but if one looks closely, they will see even more runes deep within the stone's interior. In its current state, Mogravid is only capable of communicating with whoever holds him via Limited Telepathy. Through this communication, he will explain his powers;
Morgravid the Chameleon, a Greater Free Willed Rune Item Alignment
1.Independent personality with an IQ of 20 and a MA of 25.
2.Communicates through Limited Telepathy.
3.Totally indestructible
4.A free willed Rune Item (Dragons & Gods pg232) Morgravid does not actually link to whoever holds him, but rather enters into a partnership with whoever he bonds to. Once a mutual agreement between wielder and rune item is reached, the item bonds, not only mentally with the new partner, but also physically with whatever random item is presented by the new wielder (which, btw, CAN be a game changer in the negotiations) and effectively turns said item into a Temporary Rune Artifact, making it magically indestructible and possessing the full range of powers Morgravid normally has. (see below) The item may be any non-magical weapon, piece of armor, jewelry, or shield, but once an item is chosen, the wielder MAY change the item Morgravid is bonded to. It may only be done once per week and only if the new item is of better quality than the original. Morgravid may also desire a change in appearance, occasionally making suggestions on how handy he might be as 'insert random expensive item here'. If Morgravid is feeling particularly insistent, he may even start using his psi powers to directly manipulate his partner into ponying up the dough for a new look whether he likes it or not. However, he is smart enough to not push too far. He thoroughly enjoys being active and is at least open to civil negotiation, but he will be quick to remind his partner of just how much power he has. Morgravid's powers are mostly standard rune item abilities, however a few powers are entirely based off of the type of item he is bonded with (see Bonded Powers below)
Common item powers
Regardless of what he is bonded to, Morgravid will always have these powers at his disposal:
1.Psionics: Possesses All Sensitive Psi-Powers plus the Super Psi Powers Hypnotic Suggestion and Mentally Possess Others (See Special Notes Below) ISP: 150 which recovers at a rate of 10 every 3 hours
2.Spell Magic Can cast the following Wizard spells at 6th level proficiency; Blinding Flash, Cloud of Smoke, Befuddle, Chameleon, Paralysis (Lesser), and Telekinesis. PPE: 100 which recovers at a rate of 10 per 3 hours
3.+1 bonus to ALL saving Throws
Bonded Powers
These powers are available according to whatever object Morgaravid is bonded to. There are 4 main categories of item he may bond with; Weapons, Armor, Shields, Clothing/Jewelry.
1. Weapons: If bonded with a Weapon, Morgravid becomes a Greatest Rune Weapon with the abilities listed above plus adding a +4d6 to the base damage of whatever the weapon is (Thus, bonded with a knife, Morgravid deals 5d6 damage, but, if bonded with a Sabre Halberd, he does a whopping 7d6 damage!)
He will also add an additional +2 to strike and +3 to parry in addition to any other bonuses the weapon may already carry {Thus a Dwarven weapon built with a +2 parry bonus will see that bonus increase to +5 should Morgravid bond with it).
Lastly, regardless of the type of weapon he is bonded to, the weapon's Critical Strike roll is 1 level easier. (Most critical Strikes require a roll of a natural 20. Weapons Morgravid is bonded to score a critical strike with a natural 19 or 20.)
2. Shields: If bonded to a shield, Morgravid will assume a front and center position upon the shield and it will become indestructible and see its weight reduced by half, making it easier to maneuver and granting a +4 to parry in addition to any quality bonuses like in Weapons noted above. Damage with a Shield Bash: 3d6 (small shield) or 4d6 (large shield). A Wall (minimum 4 feet by 4 feet shield) may be used to shield bash by a Giant-sized character and will do 5d6 damage
Morgravid will be able to alter the size of the shield (either upon command or as he sees fit), going from the size of an average archer's buckler (about 1 foot across) to a 10 feet high by 15 feet wide wall in a single melee attack.
The shape of any wall created from about 4 feet by 4 feet and up may have its shape altered as well, from a curved bulwark to an indestructible dome big enough for up to 4 people (6 actual maximum but it'll be a bit cramped)
3. Armor: If Morgravid becomes bonded with a suit of armor, the armor's AR is increased by +2. (A suit of Hard Leather armor would have an AR of 13 while Plate Armor goes up to an AR of 19!). The suit will also gain an additional 200 SDC.
The armor will regenerate SDC at a rate of 20 per hour, even if the armor is reduced to 0 SDC (ie it can never be completely destroyed, always getting itself back up to 20 SDC every hour)
Finally, the additional 200 SDC may also be 'spent' on temporary special features for the armor:
*Wings: Allows the wearer of the armor to fly at a speed of up to 30 mph. Using the wings to strike anything would be like a punch doing 1d6 damage. Cost: 30 SDC Duration: 30 minutes. At the end of 30 minutes, land, reinvest another 30 SDC or crash... hard.
*Claws: Like the Gryphon Claw Gloves or Dragon claw Gauntlets, claws sprout from fingertips of the back of the hands or even both. Regardless of how they look or where they come from, they all do 4d6 damage per swipe and are still considered rune weapons. Cost: 30 SDC per hand Duration 10 Melee rounds
*Horns/Spikes: Sprouting from virtually any surface the armor has, horns and spikes can be made to pop up on the helmet, shoulders, elbows, knees, forearms and shins. Some even like raising a ridge of sharp spines along the spine for added effect with wings. Damage from a Gore w/helmet horns or a spiked shoulder block would do 2d6 damage, spiked knee or elbow strikes do 3d6 damage while most other strikes would add an additional 1d6 damage to their normal damage. Cost: 10 SDC per pair of horns or spikes. A spine ridge would cost 30 SDC. Duration: 10 minutes
*Attribute Boost: Morgravid can boost the wearer's PS, PP and Spd. each attribute may be increased by up to 15 points at a cost of 2 SDC per point (max 30 SDC per Attribute). All corresponding bonuses apply for the duration of the boost. Duration: 10 minutes (Note: the Spd boost is not applicable to the speed granted with the Wings ability)
*Eyes of the Wolf: Only available if the Helmet of the armor is worn. Effects and duration identical to the Wizard spell (PFRPG pg 204) at 5th level proficiency. Self only. Cost: 25 SDC
4. Clothing/Jewelry: When added to a set of clothing or a piece of jewelry, Morgravid will assume the shape of a brooch, pendant or even a ring on the wearer's finger. On jewelry, he makes a beautiful centerpiece on crowns, tiaras and bracelets. Basically, use your imagination. Either way the following abilities are granted:
*Natural Armor: Whatever clothing the wearer has on grants the wearer a Natural AR of 14. Any roll to strike the wearer below 14 does no damage (though they will certainly FEEL the hit)
*Iron Will: grants a +3 bonus to the wearer's ME, an additional +2 to save vs Psionics AND makes the wearer IMPERVIOUS to possession or Mind control from outside sources (still vulnerable to Korgravid's Psionic manipulation,even the +2 save bonus doesn't apply, but he's not likely to mention that)
*Psi-Boost: Finally, when added to clothing or jewelry, Morgravid gains a boost to his own Psionic abilities, gaining an additional 50 ISP and ALL Physical Psi-Powers plus the Super Psi-Power of Mind Wipe.
5. If Mogravid is ever bonded with an incompatible item (such as a piece of furniture or a statue or basically ANYTHING not able to easily fall into one of the above categories) he is essentially rendered inert. He will have no powers, the item he is attached to will not be indestructible or gain any powers and he will only be able to communicate via Limited Telepathy to anyone within a 5 feet radius of the item he is attached to. Morgravid is fully awake and aware when in his inert state and he truly HATES when he has to endure it. While he will avoid this state as much as possible, he MAY be convinced to do so on the rare emergency occasion, but only for a very short while. Any longer than 48 hours and he will be really angry when he's finally let out of the bottle, so to speak.
As far as I can tell, boys and girls, old Mogravid the Chameleon here, is a unique, one of a kind Rune artifact. So far as I can see in the history books I have, there are no other Rune Items like this. And before you mention it, yes! I am fully aware of the Crystal swords, rods, wheels and so on at the Island at the Edge of the world... If anyone happens to know where others like this one are, I would be VERY interested in knowing where they are, and I am willing to pay well for such information... once the veracity of your story can be determined, of course. :quiet:
Thanks for coming by, and for those of you that have been here before, thanks for coming back. I hope to see you and your friends again soon.

EDIT: Just noticed I forgot the 'special note' I mentioned in Morgravid's Psionics section. So....
Special Note: Morgravid is a true Master of the Super Psi Power; Mentally Possess Others, so much so that it costs him only 15 ISP to use it rather than 30. The duration of the power is unchanged as is the range... Which is Touch. One of his favorite tactics in weapon form is to patiently wait until his wielded strikes a foe and, in that instant, take control of the stricken foe and use him as a puppet.
Morgravid WILL mention the he has this power to whoever tries to bond with him. What he won't mention, at least not without a little prompting, is that he can even use it on you ('the wielder'). And, unless you specifically forbid it in your agreement, he WILL use it on you when he sees fit to do so.
Regardless, anyone that gets taken over is suddenly possessed by Morgravid the Chameleon, an ancient Assassin of more than modest repute. If attacked, Morgravid's fighting style is best described as 'violently efficient'. He strikes to incapacitate, wound, cripple, maim or execute in the fastest and most efficient way possible to achieve the results he desires. His combat stats are those of his host with 2 additional attacks per melee, a +2 to Strike that can also counts toward a Critical Strike, a +4 to Parry/Dodge and a +4 to Damage. Also considered to know ALL Weapon Proficiencies at 6th level skill.
Second: Morgravid's Alignment; Aberrent with a very high intelligence (IQ: 20) and a very powerful personality (MA: 25), an extremely dangerous combination. He has a very firm grasp on his abilities, power and, most importantly, his own worth. He has a very grand view of the big picture and knows all too well how to play the long game. Of course, Morgravid's goals are his own so buyer beware. He WILL honor whatever agreement you make with him to the letter. But he will expect it from you as well. And may your gods have mercy if you don't keep your end of the bargain.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by ShadowHawk »

May I suggest doing a catalog that the mobile merchant caravans carry with them?
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

ShadowHawk wrote:May I suggest doing a catalog that the mobile merchant caravans carry with them?

An excellent suggestion, my friend, but there's just one small hitch.
Uncle Remus' Traveling Emporium is, for all intents, identical to any of his already established stores which, as many already know, can be found literally in any place, world or time. The Traveling Emporium simply puts the established stores and whatever inventory you may find in them into a convenient caravan that you may just happen across while out on the road, trekking through the wilderness or wandering about in whatever place you may be in.
Honestly, it's not really changed all that much as far as listings of available items for purchase goes.
What HAS changed a bit, however, is that now that the Emporium can be found outside of what can be considered civilized/populated areas, it could be, not only much easier to find it, but also, if you're lucky enough (and your GM allows it) Uncle Remus himself may actually be in the middle of something that he could use a little help with. This opens up worlds of possibilities for adventure ideas, introducing interesting and colorful NPCs, the potential for travel to strange and exciting new places and even earning a little extra coin on the side as 'temporary employees' of Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane. Heck, if you do well enough on whatever job you do with Uncle Remus part of your pay could even include a hefty discount on that magical item you're trying to buy.
Simply put, by putting Uncle Remus on the road with his new Traveling Emporium I am attempting to give players and GMs a way to give Uncle Remus and all of his weird and wacky things a more proactive role in their games. Perhaps your players stumble across his caravan during some downtime between adventures and the old man offers you a little coin to act as his bodyguards while he gets this thing he needs. They agree and next thing you know you're wandering the Splynn Markets of Atlantis watching his back while he looks for fresh eye of newt and a rhino buffalo horn in a shop run by a retired biomancer and hid Brodkil sidekick. Fun times! What could possibly go wrong, am I right?
Anyway, again, have fun using uncle Remus and his Emporium in any way you see fit, whether settled in a little shop in town or roaming the highways and byways of the world's. He's always around and always open.

Good luck and great gaming!
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by The Oh So Amazing Nate »

Your return is the best thing to happen to these boards in a long while. The only thing that would make me happier is if by some miracle all of the threads that were culled and purged somehow made their way back.
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Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

The Oh So Amazing Nate wrote:Your return is the best thing to happen to these boards in a long while. The only thing that would make me happier is if by some miracle all of the threads that were culled and purged somehow made their way back.


Thank you so much for that Nate. And I couldn't agree with you more. It's a shame we drift apart, but at least some of us are lucky enough to cross paths again.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by Stone Gargoyle »

Do you sell spell components?
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

Stone Gargoyle wrote: Wed May 31, 2023 1:31 pm Do you sell spell components?
Now what kind of alchemist would I be if I didn't sell components? Of course I do, good sir, any and all kinds of them, whether for spells, circles, wards, necromancy and more. If I don't have it, no one does.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by Stone Gargoyle »

What kind of cost we talking about for some of the components? Dragon scales must be pretty pricey, no?
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

Stone Gargoyle wrote: Sun Oct 01, 2023 9:55 pm What kind of cost we talking about for some of the components? Dragon scales must be pretty pricey, no?
Depends on the dragon, mostly. Factors such as dragon type and age weigh heavily into the overall worth of an individual scale. Thus a scale from a fire dragon or thunder lizard hatchling would likely cost around 100-150 gold while one from an ancient great horned dragon or 7 headed hydra could easily cost up to ten times that or more.
Interestingly enough, the scales of a Mighty Wooly Dragon tend to be worth more than most others due to the increasing rarity of these cantankerous beasts.
Fire Dragons, Ice Dragons and Thunder Lizards tend to be a lot more common than most and will often make up the low end of the price scale. 100-150 (hatchling), 200-400 (adult), 500-750 (ancient)
Great Horned Dragons, Chiang-Ku, 7 Headed Hydra and Kukulcan scales are quite pricey mostly due to the relative rarity of these majestic creatures as well as the innate power they possess. 200-400 (hatchling), 500-750 (adult), 1000-1500 (ancient)
The Cockatrice and Night Stalker Dragons are relatively rare as well, but can still be considered fairly common by comparison thus bringing up the mid range of price. 200-500 (hatchling), 600-750 (adult), 1000-1250 (ancient)
Finally, while they are indeed dragons, the Serpent of the Wind, Lodox and Ultucan dragons do NOT have scales. Interestingly enough, the hide of these creatures is simply a relatively thick skin rather than a scaly one.
Sure, lions and tigers are stronger...
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by Stone Gargoyle »

What would a shirt of dragon scale armor cost then? Do you give deals on various pieces of armor? Or are you unable to make the armor and just sell the scales?
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

Reverse order answering here...
Yes, I am quite capable of making armor from both dragon scales and hide as well as simply selling you the scales as well. Of course, nearly any blacksmith or leatherworker worth their salt could do the same, and maybe have it ready for you faster than I could (I'm a decent smith, but there are plenty out there that make me look like a rank amateur) Heck, Dwarves have been making Dragon scale armor longer than recorded history can remember.
Yes, I give deals on various pieces of armor, whether dragon scale/hide, leather, steel, enchanted or mundane. Let me know what you're looking for and I'll let you know what I can do for you.
And finally, a shirt of dragon scale armor would likely cost you around 10-15 thousand gold. It would be long sleeved and protect you from your neck down to about thee middle of your shins, thus providing an AR of 16 with about 75 SDC and would weigh in at about 15-20 pounds. The armor would also provide a natural resistance based on the type of dragon the armor is made from (ie fire resistance from fire dragons, cold resistance from frost dragons and so on). Such resistances would reduce the particular damage type by half.
Of course there is one particular drawback to dragon scale/hide armor, that basically being the same drawback found with dragon bone weapons; the possible emnity of dragons seeing you wearing the skin of their brethren. All things considered, it's a relatively low chance, but there are dragons out there that don't look too favorably upon those who would dare to wear such a grisly trophy.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by Stone Gargoyle »

What other creatures can be made into armor? Are there any creatures you would like to have pieces of to make things out of, and do you offer work to adventurers who can bring you said items?
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

Stone Gargoyle wrote: Sun Oct 15, 2023 8:12 pm What other creatures can be made into armor? Are there any creatures you would like to have pieces of to make things out of, and do you offer work to adventurers who can bring you said items?
Just about any creature with a relatively thick hide or heavy duty scales can have their skins turned into armor. Elephants and rhinos are some pretty hefty candidates, having really thick leathery skins that are great for use in making leather armor, particularly for the giant sized races like ogres, trolls, wolfen and so on. For human sized wearers, elephant and rhino leather tends to be a bit bulky and inflexible due to the naturally thicker state of the skin itself, but most experienced tanners are quite capable of making adjustments.

Generally, any animal the size of a large pig or bigger can likely have its hide tanned and cured for use as leather armor. The larger the animal, the more material you can get from it. For example, the skin of a full grown cow or horse could very well provide a full suit of leather armor, possibly with a bit to spare. On the other hand, the skin of even a large hog will probably only get about half that.

Humanoid skins could also potentially be used for this purpose, though most are simply too thin on their own and would likely have to be layered several times to be effective as armor. Some reptilian humanoids such as lizard men and gromek have significantly thicker skins, but would very likely still need about two or three layers in order to get a decent level of protection.

And no, I really don't offer much work to bring me in animal skins unless I need something particularly exotic for a special order of some kind. As I said before, I'm not really much of a tanner or blacksmith and generally get my leather goods from a professional tanner. However, ask around a few places that specialize in leather goods. You may find someone looking for a particular hide to work with.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

I know it's been a long time, but I think it's about time I get some more product on the shelves. so, after a bit of experimenting with a few ideas, I think I've got something everybody might like here. Introducing, the latest Uncle Remus exclusive....

Breath Mints
Inspired by the old Refreshing mints, Breath Mints are a fun and exciting little thing to try. Breath Mints come in a wide variety of colors, flavors and effects. They are small, easily chewable tablets that are eaten by the user to activate the individual effects. Multiple Breath Mints may be eaten to extend the duration of the individual effects, however, if a different type of Breath Mint is consumed before the duration of the original type used expires, the new flavor will cancel out the old one regardless of how much longer it was supposed to last. For example, someone takes a Barbeque Breath Mint, gaining the ability to Breathe Fire for 5 melee rounds. After 1 melee round, they take another Barbeque Breath Mint, extending the duration of the Fire Breath another 5 rounds (for a total of 9 rounds at this particular point). Then, for whatever reason, the user takes a Wintergreen Breath Mint to gain a Frost Breath ability. The user will indeed gain Frost Breath but only for 5 melee rounds AND they LOSE the Fire Breath ability from the Barbeque Breath Mint completely (Unless they consume yet another Barbeque Breath Mint, or some other random flavor, which will cancel out the Wintergreen and start the whole process all over again) 

Sold individually or in packs of 10 or 20 at a slight discount. Below is a relatively short list of flavors available (there are literally THOUSANDS of possible flavors/effects). If you don't see a flavor you want, ask for it. I'll be more than happy to dig a few of them up and sell them to you. Of course, those flavors will have their own unique effects as well, so buyer beware.

Cost in gold: 500 each, 4500 for a pack of 10, 8000 for a pack of 20
*Packs of 10 or 20 may be bought with either a single flavor OR as a random variety pack*

Breath Mint Flavors

Barbeque: A rich, robust combination of tangy flavors found only at the best Texas cookouts. Allows the user to Breathe Fire like a dragon! Range: 20 feet, Duration 5 melee rounds, Damage: 4d6 plus a 64% chance of setting combustibles ablaze, inflicting an additional 1d6 damage per melee for 5 melee rounds

Wintergreen: a refreshing, minty taste that sends chills down your spine. Allows the user to Breathe Frost like a dragon! Range: 20 feet, Duration: 5 melee rounds, Damage: 4d6 plus a 64% chance of immobilizing human sized or smaller targets as they are literally frozen in place for 5 melee rounds.

Salt: Actually safe for Changelings to eat because it's not salt, just salt flavored. Allows the user to spit Lightning! Range: 50 feet, Duration: 5 melee rounds, Damage: 3d6 plus a 50% chance to stun the target, causing them to lose 1 attack and inflict a -3 to Strike, Parry and Dodge for 5 melee rounds.

Lemon: So tart, it'll make parts of you pucker that probably shouldn't. Allows the user to spit Acid! Range: 20 feet, Duration: 5 melee rounds, Damage: 3d6 plus 1d6 per round for 5 melee rounds or 2d6 damage per round for 5 melee rounds to METAL

Onion: A savory yet bitter taste that lingers in your mouth. Allows the user to breathe a Poison Gas Cloud! Range: 40 feet; the cloud fills a 10 foot area, Duration: 5 melee rounds; individual clouds dissipate after 2 melee rounds, Damage: Victims within the clouds save against Non-Lethal Poison EVERY melee round they are within the cloud. Every failed save results in the victim taking 3d6 damage.

Sugar: Sweet, sweet, SWEET! Allows the user to Regenerate damage automatically at a rate of 4d6 per melee round. Duration: 5 melee rounds

Beef: Hearty and robust, like a perfectly cooked steak. Temporarily increases the user's PS attribute by 10, including any bonus to Damage. User can also lift/carry 50% more than normal. Duration: 5 melee rounds

Banana: A lightly sweet, tropical taste. Temporarily increases the user's PP attribute by 10, including bonuses to Strike, Parry and Dodge. User also gets a +1 to initiative. Duration: 5 melee rounds

Bread: Simple and hearty, yet relatively plain. Temporarily increases the user's PE by 10 points, including any saving throw bonuses. User also gets an additional 10 temporary Hit Points. Duration: 5 melee rounds

Coffee: A bold, rich flavor, but rather bitter. Temporarily increases the user's Spd by 10 points. User also gets a +3 to initiative. Duration: 5 melee rounds

That's all I got for now folks, but don't worry, the menu WILL expand. Especially if you get those suggestions rolling in. Some come on down! Ask for a flavor and let's find out what it'll do to you! Only at Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane!
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by Stone Gargoyle »

You need to make Strawberry, Butterscotch, Licorice, Peanut Butter and Dark Chocolate.
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

Stone Gargoyle wrote: Mon Nov 20, 2023 11:41 pm You need to make Strawberry, Butterscotch, Licorice, Peanut Butter and Dark Chocolate.
You are absolutely correct. So...

Breath Mints (new flavors)

Strawberry: A light and sweet fruit flavor that's just a little tangy. Temporarily increased the user's MA by 10 points, plus adds an additional 10% bonus to Public Speaking, Sing, Seduction, Disguise/Impersonation and Interrogation skills. Duration: 5 melee rounds

Butterscotch: A rich, buttery sweet flavor very popular with children and the elderly. Grants the user an Ancestral Flash, allowing him to perform any one skill he does not already have at 80% proficiency OR grant a 20% bonus to any one skill he already knows. This knowledge fades away at the end of the duration and no Weapon Proficiencies or HtH Combat skills may be learned or boosted in this way. Physical skills may be learned in this manner, but the user only gets to use any special maneuvers granted by the skill, NOT the attribute bonuses. (For example, you may learn Gymnastics and be able to tumble, do backflips, etc, but you would not get the PS or PP bonuses. Boxing would grant you the Natural 20 automatic Knock out, but no bonuses to PS or SDC) Duration: 5 melee rounds

Licorice: A bold yet bitter taste, used in some candies but not for the faint of heart. Gives the user a 20 point bonus to his SDC. Damage the user sustains after taking this mint is first subtracted from this temporary SDC. Once depleted, the user takes damage as normal. Duration: 5 melee rounds. *Please note, the maximum SDC boost from this mint is 20. Taking additional mints extends the duration, but also resets the SDC bonus back to 20. So, if you take one mint, then take 10 damage, then take another mint you'll have 20 bonus SDC (not 30) for 10 melee rounds.

Peanut Butter: A rich, hearty flavor that tends to linger in the mouth. A particular favorite among the Canine races. Allows the user to literally spit out Carpets of Adhesion once per melee round. The Carpets themselves are extremely small (about 3 square feet, enough to catch/immobilize a single human sized or smaller target) and victims are allowed the standard save vs Spell Magic to escape. Duration of each mini Carpet is 5 melee rounds. Duration of this particular Breath Mint is only 3 melee rounds.

Dark Chocolate: A decadently rich, bittersweet flavor used in a wide variety of candies and pastries. Gives the user Love Charm breath. Can only be used against a single target. Victims must save vs Spell Magic or be affected by a Love Charm (PFFPG pg 204), including the possible side effects. Duration of the Love Charm is only 5 melee rounds. Duration of the Breath Mint is only 3 melee rounds and the target/victim MUST be within 3 feet of the user. (The closer the better. Victims must save once every melee round they are within range)

There we go. Unfortunately I hear Auntie Remus hollering from the lab so more to follow as soon as possible. Enjoy everybody!
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by Stone Gargoyle »

Peppermint and pumpkin spice?
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by JuliusCreed »

Stone Gargoyle wrote: Sun Nov 26, 2023 4:39 pm Peppermint and pumpkin spice?
Hmmmmmm... Let's see....

Peppermint: A refreshing, if rather sharp, mint flavor, popular in many candies, particularly around holiday seasons. Grants the user temporary immunity to cold and cold based attacks. User takes no damage and suffers no penalties/side effects from exposure to even extreme levels of cold. Duration: 10 melee rounds

Pumpkin spice: A particular blend of sweet and savory spices used in a wide variety of drinks, candies and baked goods. Grants the user a temporary Charismatic Aura. (PFRPG pg 194) However, it only grants the Friendship/Trust aspect of the spell. Targets within the area of effect are allowed the standard save against magic. Duration: 10 melee rounds
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Re: Welcome to Uncle Remus' Emporium of the Arcane

Unread post by GoliathReturns »

A minotaur steps in, wearing soft blue robes that drape open, a pair of wards sewn into his exposed chest.

"I assume you're the esteemed Uncle Remus I've heard so much about. My name is Goliath, and I have here 5 dwarven lightning grenades, from the Great War, as well as *he taps a book* the instructions on constructing them"

*he sets 5 jars on the counter, all wrapped in several layers of padding*

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Dwarven Lightning Grenades are glass jars, with two pieces of copper sticking to the lid, a spark bouncing back and forth. The jars only have 1 sdc, so easily shatter. Upon breaking, they do 4d6 damage to the target, 3d6 to everyone within 5 feet, 2d6 to everyone in within 5-10 feet, and 1d6 to everyone 10-15 feet away from impact. Double damage to any targets wearing metal armor.
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"I would gladly trade all 4, and a copy of the instructions, in exchange for a unique magic item relating to the game of chess. Not to help me win, or cheat, just something to add spice to a game"

-GS
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